Psychotherapy and Wellness Programs
Photo by Susan K. Harrison
Grief Support
Most people, through the course of their lives, will experience grief, often several times. Grief is an experience of loss that is full of strong emotions that can leave us feeling lost or unsettled. Depression, lethargy, inability to concentrate, loss of appetite, poor sleep, intrusive thoughts and other physical and emotional experiences are common manifestations of grief after a loss. And while, we often think of grief as being connected to the death of a loved one, there are many situations that can lead us to grieve:
Loss of a Career
Divorce or loss of a significant relationship
Loss of Financial Security or one’s home or homeland
Death of a Pet
Loss of Health
Coming Out as a Gender or Sexual Minority
Having a Partner who Comes Out as a Gender or Sexual Minority
Emigrating to another Country
Having a Child with Special Needs
Infertility or miscarriage
Grief can even be experienced prior to the occurrence of loss. Being the caregiver for someone who is dying or suffering from dementia, or considering the decision to come out as a gender or sexual minority can move you to a place where the anticipation of future loss leads to an experience of grief in the present.
These losses or the anticipation of loss in the future can go unnoticed by friends or family, which can further deepen grief, leaving you feeling alone, unheard and disenfranchised. Grief is a common human experience, that most people will go through at some point or another. Connecting with others who will support you, connecting with the wider world, and connecting to the natural world can all be ways of building support into your life to see you through your time of need.
Individual Psychotherapy
Psychotherapy gives you a place where you can speak and be heard. Here your voice has power as it gives expression to your lived reality, and your reality is affirmed. With gentle questioning, you will be invited to explore the meaning behind your grief, and ways in which you can give significance to your experience. For example, creating traditions to remember a loved one who has died, or taking time to remember the good in past relationships and the reasons you have outgrown them, can be means of taking grief, giving it an outlet, and allowing it to serve you going forward.
Mindfulness Practices
Mindfulness practices help you to get in touch with your inner dialogue and emotional experiences. They are a chance to pause and listen to what is happening within. Grief can be a complex overlay of several different emotions and physical experiences; taking time to listen to your thoughts and feelings is important. Unravelling the complexity of your grief can help you discover any thoughts that are pervasive or disruptive. Knowledge is power when it comes to complex grief. Knowing more about your own experience and inner dialogue gives you the power to make changes, or even gives you the freedom to ignore those thoughts as they come.
Support Groups
By participating in a support group, you gain the experience of being heard and having the support of others as you journey through your grief together, reminding you that you are not alone. Your particular experience of grief will be different from other’s; but grief is journey that most people will go through. By listening to others’ experiences you can learn new ways of coping in difficult times; by sharing your own journey, you may discover your own inner wisdom; and by hearing others’ stories you may develop a keener sense of empathy, and a greater connection to those around you, which will in turn build your strength
Forest Therapy
Forest Therapy reconnects us to the natural world. For those who are grieving, it invites you to be a part of something that is much bigger, broader, and more ancient than yourself, and to learn from the earth’s natural cycles. For some, this can be a comforting way of confronting the realities of life and death, beginnings and endings. For more information about Forest Therapy, visit Hummingbird Healing Connections’ Forest Therapy page.
Grief and Covid-19
The Covid-19 pandemic has brought us to a time of collective grief in our culture, our country, and our world. We are all experiencing loss in some way or another. Those things that we once did that brought joy and meaning to our lives – recreational activities, religious observances, gathering with family, going to work or school – have been drastically changed, or have stopped altogether. Being with loved ones is not always possible, even in a hospital or nursing home. . And when a loved one dies, we are limited in how we can gather to celebrate their life and remember them. This has led to many people feeling alone in their grief in the midst of this crisis. I have found the resource below to be very helpful.
The guide addresses the challenges of grieving a loved one’s death during the COVID-19 pandemic, including the nature of grief; traumatic loss and its triggers; ambiguous losses; and the risk of disenfranchised grief. It also addresses the importance of talking to children about death and memorialization and the difficulties of being separated from a loved one at the time of their death; and it offers guidance on how families can meaningfully celebrate the life of their loved one and discusses the importance of maintaining your health while grieving.